Shattered Glass

Today I had a moment of clear spiritual and mental vision. This was a lesson I was not prepaed for and it caught me off gaurd. I have been on the go since last Friday (by my choice) and I decided I needed a day off. I needeed to rest and take care of me. Anyway, I have some possesions that someone close to me has been holding since last year and this person is uncomfortable with my dressing and living full time as a woman and I fear that in order to spend time with this person I they will want me to go as a man and I decided today that I am no longer willing to play that game. I cannot play the manipulation gae anymore it puts my sobriety in jeopardy and no thing is worth loosing that. By taking this stance I stand to lose my family because I won't conform to what they believe I should be. There isn't just one person who disapproves of my transitioning and that is their problem not mine. I must live in a matter that will bolster my sobriety and help me to live a happy and fufiling life. Coming to this realization has shattered my reality like a glass breaking on the floor. This is not a bad thing as some would think this is good because it frees me from worry about the judgements I will face in my life. I am not about to say that being judged won't effect me but I would like to lessen the power it has over me. I am willing to walk away from everything to be who I am if that is what is neccessary. Do I want it to be that way? No. However if that is the way it must be so be it. I will do what I have to do to survive and live a full life. I must nurture my spirit and love myself enough to do what I need to so I will. I am fearful of what may happen but I will not let that fear rule my life



This is the approved fanlisting for the Christopher Rice book, A Density of Souls.



Fear cannot touch me...
It can only taunt me,
It cannot take me,
Just tell me where to go...
I can either follow,
Or stay in my bed...
I can hold on
To the things that I know...
The dead stay dead,
They cannot walk.
The shadows are darkness.
And darkness cannot talk.